{The People You Should Not Date}

To start off, there are many people that everyone knows you shouldn't date, like the typical jerk, player, drama queen, addict, and all those other stereotypes. But I want to go a little bit more deeper than that. So, these are the people who I think you should just avoid dating.

Don't be in a relationship with someone who:

1. Is JUST your best friend.

Yes, I know everyone says to "date/marry your best friend", and while that is a good thing for your significant other to be, that's not the only thing they should be. On top of being your best friend, you should also be attracted to them and have other feelings for them other than "best friend". You should be in love with them, not just love them. If I married someone who was just my best friend, I could have married like 8 different people (you know who you are), mostly being girls. So, I say avoid dating the "best friend" unless you see them as someone more than just your best friend.

2. Makes you do all the work.

I've been in relationships like this. They suck. It just plains sucks. And I think everyone has been in a relationship like this sometime in their life. You spend your money on them and they rarely spend money on you. You change your plans to their plans. You do what they want to do. You hang out with their family and rarely yours. And just everything seems to be about them while you're running around trying to make them happy. They're just making you do all the work in the relationship. And if you feel like that is the relationship you are in now, my advice-GET OUT NOW! It may be hard, but I can promise you that you can find someone who dedicates as much time and energy to you as you do to them. 

3. Has only one good quality-their looks.

How many times do people have to say this. It's not worth it to date someone who's only good quality is their looks!!! Yes, they may be totally sexy and have a killer smile, but if they are boring or have a crappy personality, do you really want to be with them? Looks fade, honey. I'm the type of girl who loves hearing people talk about their significant others, why they like them, and how they met. And I find it SO sad when I ask someone about their lover, they say, "They're sooo hot" and that's it. They usually mention something about them either being super conceited, rude or not treating them very good, but for some reason it's okay just because they are attractive. Don't get me wrong, it's perfectly fine to be attracted to someone. Actually, it's great. Michael is the most attractive guy in the entire world to me. But, that shouldn't be the only positive you can say about the person you are dating.

4. Loves to make you jealous or piss you off.

I don't even think I need to go any further on this one. It's just messed up, they don't truly care about you, and you shouldn't be with them. Period.

5. Doesn't encourage you to be your best self.

Your significant other should always be supporting you and encouraging you in every way possible no matter what. Whether it's in school, religion, work, hobbies, skills, sports, or just absolutely ANYTHING! One small thing Michael does is to encourage me to get ready for the day sometimes. It's not like he's telling me to go put on some make up because I look ugly without it, he encourages me to do my hair, make up, and get dressed up because he knows that it boosts my self esteem so much more. Whenever we go out and I'm just in yoga pants, with a pony tail and a little make up, we have so much fun and he still thinks I'm beautiful. But the best nights ever are the ones when I get ready; when my hair is all curled and I spent time on my make up and I have a cute little outfit on. He knows that looking good makes me a lot happier and makes me feel a lot better about myself. Your significant other should always be encouraging  you to do whatever would make you the happiest.

6. Doesn't listen to you.

Communication is key. Seriously. That's like the number one thing needed to make a relationship work. And if you find that your significant other never listens to you or doesn't care for your opinion, well then, your relationship will never work unless that gets fixed. It's as simple as that. 

7. Doesn't want you to hang out with friends.

One thing I love about Michael is that is he 100% supportive of Girls' Night. He understands that I need a little time with my girls to gossip, laugh, take pictures, and talk....A LOT, just like I know that he needs his bowling or COD nights. Before we had each other, we had our friends. We love our friends. And you shouldn't be with someone who only wants you to hang out with them and never wants you to be with your friends. Being in a relationship like that completely drains you. Your significant other should keep in mind that they're not the only person in your entire life. 

So, kind of going in an opposite perspective, here is the person you should be with. You should be with someone who is your best friend and more, someone who would do anything for you, someone who is good looking AND has a lot of other good qualities, someone who wants to make you happy, someone who encourages you to be your best self, someone who listens to you and someone who supports your friendships. That's the perfect person for you. Believe me. And it may take a while to find that person, but it will all be worth it in the end. Trust me. I found mine.

{Local Businesses That I Love}

A few of the local businesses that I have come to just love around the East Valley Arizona area. Enjoy!

Jaxn Blvd

I first found Jaxn Blvd through a friend who shared their page on Instagram in efforts to try to win a free sign. Upon seeing the signs in the picture that was posted, I just HAD to follow the company profile and look at more signs that she made. After a few weeks, I decided on one sign finally that I wanted to put in my house. (Believe me, I loved all of them, but I am trying really hard to cut back my spending) I chose a gorgeous black and white striped sign with a gold glitter heart. A couple months later, she posted a picture of a sign that reads, "This home runs on Love, Laughter, and lots of Diet Coke" and I just HAD to get it for my mother in law. I will definitely be ordering more signs for my home in days to come. You can find this cute little shop on Instagram and Etsy.

Shelley Bee Originals

Yet again, I found another adorable shop owned by an adorable lady. If I could marry skirts (sorry Mike), I would marry hers. They are the cutest modest skirts around. She has so many different styles and patterns to offer. The possibilities are endless! I love looking at all of the adorable pictures she posts that her customers send to her. It's nice to see the clothing on actually people instead of models. After carefully deciding, I chose one skirt that I absolutely loved-a floral pencil skirt. It fit me so nicely and it's just so fun to wear. I can't wait to get another skirt soon. Possibly a twirly or mismatched on this time. You can find these adorable skirts on Etsy and Instagram. 

{By the way, this picture totally wasn't posed. Props to my hubby for taking this while fluffling my hair thinking I was about to take a picture}

My Event Film

My Event Film is run by David Nuttall, who just happened to be my old high school's video production teacher, so I already knew his work was fantastic. Soon after getting engaged and starting to plan our wedding, I was thinking about if I wanted to get a wedding film done. Ha. OF COURSE I wanted to get a wedding film done! So, I started looking around at different companies. In Novemeber, I attended a wedding of a close family friend and noticed David Nuttall filming around the wedding and reception. After talking around, I found out he was their wedding film videographer. I'm pretty sure my parents even talked to him that night. I soon emailed him and found out that he had my wedding weekend free and we booked his services soon after. He was very easy to work with and our wedding film turned out absolutely AMAZING! I still watch it all the time. You can visit his website at myeventfilm.com  and click here to view our wedding video.

DownEast Basics

Where do I even start with this place? This store is my clothing shopping dream place and home decor dream place all wrapped up in one! I have shopped at DownEast Basics for years and was SO excited when they finally built one in the San Tan Village Shopping Center. I go into this store all the time. This has to be one of my favorite stores to get skirts and dresses; I just love them all! Now that I have my own little home, I love looking through all of the home decor items as well. What I especially love about this store is that I can shop online and in store, and I always seem to be able to find something adorable on sale. They have several locations all over the East Valley. DownEast is just so chic and modern, and I can't wait to go on another shopping spree!

Swirl It

It's seems like self-serve froyo is all the rage these days. And I totally understand why! I love being able to go into a shop, fill up my cup with whatever flavors sound good, and load it up with tons of topping! However, there are just so many froyo shops that have opened up within the past couple of years that sometimes it's hard to choose which shop to go to. My favorite definitely has to be Swirl It. It's located next to my gym about 15 minutes away on Val Vista and Williams Field. Why I like Swirl It better than any other self serve froyo shop is because I always end up loving all of the choices that they have there. They always seem to have a few of my favorite flavors of frozen yogurt, tons of yummy toppings (including Magic Shell, which i love!), you can throw in a whole candy bar, and it's just an adorable place to go. They even do a digital punch card and offer discounts on their free App. My husband and I have even developed a little habit of going there after the gym sometimes, but hey, to us it's worth it. 

{Post work out Swirl It run}

{More businesses to come soon. Please comment below if you have a local business that you love and would like for me to check out!}

{Things Not To Say To A Newlywed}

I've been holding these feelings in for quite a while and I am sure that a lot of you newlywed girls can agree with  me on these. (Not directed at anyone in particular. These have been said to me numerous times)

1. You're married at 20? Good luck with that!

Even though this is said kind of jokingly, it is still super rude to say. It is usually said in a super sarcastic way with the person hinting at you that getting married young is a mistake. Recently, I had a coworker say this to me, but he actually said it in a nice way that I didn't have a problem with. I had heard it a million times from other people, so when he said it, I was kinda like "yeah, yeah, whatever". But then he stopped me and told me the story of him and his ex-wife. At the end, he told me that he really wishes he could have kept making their marriage work, but it just ended for them. He said he really did mean "Good Luck" to me in a nice way and that he hoped my marriage would be full of happiness. THAT is the only exception here. 

2. You know, 50% of marriages end in divorce. 

You know what? I don't think it's exactly 50% of marriages and plus, it doesn't mean that our marriage will end in divorce. And I think that it is completely unnecessary to say that to someone who is recently married or plan on getting married. In all reality here, how many marriages do people go into thinking, "I'm probably going to end up divorcing them in 10 years?" I don't think many. It just kind of happens after time and with reasons behind it. And also, just because I'm married young, doesn't necessarily mean I am more likely to get a divorce.  

3. When are you having kids?

Probably not for a couple years unless God plans differently for us. Mike and I want to spend the first couple years of our marriage as just us. We like going out on Friday nights as a newlywed couple and not having to worry about finding a babysitter. We like sleeping in on Saturday and Sunday mornings and not having to get up to take care of the kids. We like randomly going places and not having to strap the baby in the car seat or deal with them throwing a fit at the store or restaurant. We are newlyweds. And I don't really want to have a kid right away. I'm not saying anything is wrong with having kids at a young age or right when you get married, it's just not for me. 

4. You'll understand when you have kids.

This one especially eats at me. Most of the time when this is said to me, it's something that I ALREADY DO understand and is probably a reason that I don't want kids at this exact moment in my life. I have babysat kids for the past 9 years of my life. Believe me, I have watched so many kids in my lifetime that I think I know every childish stereotype there is. And I'm not saying that being a babysitter and nanny is the same thing as being a mother, because it's not. They are very different, but actually very similar in a lot of ways. And yes, I may not know exactly what you are going through with your kids or the feelings that you feel, but I definitely "understand". I have heard several times from parents that they were up all night because their kid didn't want to go to bed, and when I make any comment back, I will get the "You'll understand when you have kids" phrase. My opinion is-tell them to get their butt to bed. Personally, that's how I grew up. When I was 5 years old, I don't ever remember staying up as long as I wanted playing just because "I wanted to". If I didn't want to go to bed, too bad for me. I went to bed anyways. I was five. And I think it is absolutely ridiculous for some parents to let their kids be the boss of them just because they want to be the "fun parent" or they're just "too nice". Be the boss of your five year old and make them go to sleep.

5. You'll be different once you're married for a long time

Actually, I won't be. I will ALWAYS love my sweet husband and I will ALWAYS try to go out of my way to make him happy. I will always cuddle up on him. I will always kiss him in public. I will always give him holiday gifts (yes, even Easter and St. Patrick's Day). I will always want to sit next to him. I will always want to look cute on "date night" with him. You choose whether you change or not. You choose whether you want to be affectionate or not. Mike and I are both affectionate people. We love being next to each other and we love just loving each other. And I don't think that will ever change. Recently, I left this note for Mike to see when he got home from work:

Some people thought it was super sweet and a super cute idea. Some people thought I was just being sarcastic. And some people said that "it will be different once you're married for a while". I love writing Mike randomly cute notes for him to find and read and I won't ever stop doing that. I won't ever stop writing a simple "I Love You" on his napkin when I pack him a lunch for work. I won't ever stop doing those things, even when we're married for a long time. I will always love him and I think that our love will even grow stronger the longer we're married.

{After That}

I left off on {What Came Next} right when Michael and I shared our first kiss. It's been a week so it's time for me to write more!

So, yeah, we kissed! Finally! It was an amazing experience and made me feel even closer to Michael. Over the next few weeks, I was surprised at how close I had already gotten to him. I was already singing my lungs out in his car, acting goofy, and he had seen me without make up. However, we still hadn't really put a label on our relationship, and the thought of doing so made me really nervous. I REALLY liked Mike. For some reason though I was scared of the boyfriend/girlfriend label. I think deep down I was afraid because my past two relationships lasted over a year and both ended in a pretty sad way, so I was just afraid to grow too attached and get hurt again. But I liked Mike so much that I tried to convince myself to take that risk. 

{First picture taken together}

In the beginning of May 2013, I attended the Brian and Michaela Weber wedding with Mike and his family. We shared a slow dance on the dance floor that night and I remember how great it felt to be in his arms and dance. We ran into Mike McDowell that night and he even told me what a great guy Michael is. I remember thinking the whole night that I knew Mike was the guy I was supposed to be with. I just knew. 

On May 6th, Mike and I sat outside my house and talked about our relationship. We talked about how close we had grown together and the feelings that we had for each other. Pretty much, that night we were discussing if we would actually continue being together as more than just "dating" or break it off. I knew I wanted to be his girlfriend. And at the end of the talk, we decided to stay together and I was so happy that I was now the "girlfriend" to such an amazing guy.

After that night, we had an awesome next couple of months. We went to Prescott for one weekend to visit his grandparents, we went to the cabin with his family, the Paint Fight was super fun, and we went on plenty of fun dates. We even planned for Mike to come on the yearly Imperial Beach trip with my family. 

That 4th of July week trip to the beach with Mike is one of my memories of our relationship. We swam together in the ocean, watched late night movies, ate at several restaurants, walked down the pier hand in hand, went exploring down the beach, and so much more. On July 2nd, I sat on Mike's lap on our hotel room balcony that overlooked the ocean, listened to the waves and just talked. For a few weeks, I had had this overwhelming feeling that I had already fallen in love with Mike. As we sat there in such a calm, beautiful place, I knew that I wanted to let Mike know of my true feelings for him. 

 

We were silent for a few minutes and I asked Mike was he was thinking about. His response was, "Well, I don't know why it has taken me so long to say this, but I love you."

 

I instantly felt the biggest smile come across my face. I turned around to face him, said "I love you too!", and kissed him. I was the happiest girl in the world at that moment.

The rest of the trip was pure bliss. On the 4th of July, we went down to Seaport Village in San Diego to shop around and watch the fireworks. As we cuddled, kissed, and laughed together while watching the fireworks burst over us, I knew I was where I was supposed to be in my life with the perfect person for me.

{How to be the Perfect Woman}

After thinking about this concept for quite a while and looking up other people's opinions of "The Perfect Woman", I decided to make a master list of all the qualities that a "Perfect Woman" would have and this is how it turned out:

1. Hilarious sense of humor

2. Perfectly straight teeth that are blindingly white

3. Stomach that is flat as a board

4. Small Feet that have no calluses and freshly painted toe nails

5. Hair with no roots showing and always done

6. No acne or acne scars

7. Perfectly shaped eyebrows

8. Knows how to handle herself in every situation

9. Plump lips

10. No stretch marks

11. Freshly manicured hands

12. Cooks every meal to perfection

13. Fresh and perfect make up

14. Two words: Thigh Gap

15. Knows how to sew anything

16. Firm butt

17. Street smart and book smart

18. Completely hairless all over

19. Independent

20. Perky breasts

21. Donates tons of free time and money to charity

22. Has spot on fashion sense

23. Spontaneous, laid back, and playful

24. ALWAYS happy

25. Liked by everyone

Let's be real now for a minute though. You'll never be that perfect woman. And neither will I! Something that I know is going through everyone's mind while reading this is that one specific girl that they "think" has all of these qualities.But, I can GUARANTEE you that there isn't a perfect woman out there. We all have certain flaws and we are usually the only ones who see those flaws in ourselves. So, what do you say girls? Let's just all be happy with who we are, love ourselves, and decide to see the {PERFECT} things about us, because although we may not be perfect, we are all {AMAZING}!

{My Opinions on Young Marriage}

I was married at 19. Michael was 23. I had only known Michael less than one year. And I have heard it all. “You’re still a baby!”, “How can you know he’s the one at such a young age?”, “Party it up while you’re young! Don’t get married. Don’t even have a boyfriend! Live the fun single life!”, “You don’t even know everything about him”, and “You’re throwing the rest of your life away by getting married young”. 

Yes all those statements are somewhat true. I did get married at a young age, even seeming like a baby to some. I just know he’s the one for me. I knew there was something different about him from the moment I met him. I agree, the single life is super fun! But for the “Party it up part”, I do. Michael and I go to parties together, dance together and have tons of fun together. Yes, I don’t know everything about him, but I am learning more and more every day. Even if you get married at age 30 after knowing the guy for 10 years, I can guarantee that you don’t know everything about him. And actually, I feel like the rest of my life is just beginning by getting married and starting my life with my sweetheart.

Getting married young isn’t for everyone though and I’m not trying to say getting married young is “better” than waiting. Everyone is different. Some people get married younger than me, some people wait a lot longer. And it bothers me that there’s this pressure for everyone to be in a relationship or dating. People are constantly asking people my age “where their boyfriend is” or “now when are you going to get married?” They are going to have a boyfriend when they find a good guy they like and get married when they please.

As for me, I really do love being married young. It rocks! For one, Michael and I get to grow up together. We get to go through parts of our lives as a married couple and as best friends, and I love that. I will live the rest of my life with a new name. I already have a second family that I love. Also, Michael and I both didn’t have our careers set yet or kids, so those weren’t things we had to consider before deciding to get married. I really could go on and on about why I love being married young.

Being married at 19, however, DEFINITELY wasn’t my plan. My plan was to graduate college and have a career going before I ever got married. But life works in mysterious ways. And I wouldn’t change a single thing in Michael and I’s adventure of meeting, dating, and getting married.

{What Came Next}

So, I left off on my story of {How It All Started} with Mike at the point right after our very first date. I have been itching to write more, mainly because I just love looking back on how my relationship started with Michael.

To me, our first date was perfect. It was full of casual fun with not too much pressure, but left me wanting more, if that makes sense. I wanted more time with him. I wanted to keep dating him. I even texted him that night telling him how much fun I had (and he tells me now that he loved that I texted him right after). So, I was glad that the next day was Sunday so we would get to see each other because of church. At church that day, we were told that there would be an activity of everyone going to the Easter Pageant on Tuesday; so of course, I was excited to have yet another excuse to hang out with Michael. He offered to pick me up and we would drive together to the activity together. Um, yay! I mean, I guess that would be okay.

So Tuesday rolled around, Mike knocked on my door, and I came out trying not to show my excitement. He opened the door for me, like always, and I couldn't help thinking that I was already falling for this guy. It was such an amazing feeling, but scared me a little too. We drove over to the Mesa Temple and met up with our YSA (Young Single Adults) group. Mike even brought a blanket with him, because he knew I got cold easily. We shared the blanket as the program began. I then did what I am pretty sure every single girl EVER has done. I kept my hand available enough to grab, but not too obvious that I wanted him to hold my hand. After the Easter Pageant was over and we were chatting with people, I got asked several times by different girls if Mike and I came together. I blushingly said, “Yes, we did”.  People were starting to notice us together, and it had only been 3 days since our first date!

Mike and I heard then that some people were going to Red Robin, so we decided to tag along. As we all sat down and ordered, the waitress asked if we were all on separate checks. Everyone said “Yes”. As the waitress was about to leave to put the orders in, Mike then stopped her and said, “Actually, she (gesturing to me) is going to be on my check as well.” I instantly felt people look in my direction and I could feel myself blush a little. Jeez! Why does this guy just make me feel so giddy by saying the simplest of things?! Mike then excused himself to the bathroom, and once he was out of earshot, and everyone turned to me. Emily (previously Fowkes, now Snow) said to me, “So are you guys dating?” and I was just like, “I guess kinda!” I didn't really know exactly what to say!

For the next week, we went on plenty of dates and spent a lot of time together. Then, on March 27^th, Mike picked me up for a date that I was looking forward to. He was taking me to Dave & Busters because I had never been there before. On the long drive there, we talked away. I remember how I just felt so comfortable talking to him about anything and he thought it was cool that I could memorize songs and raps so well. Mike and I walked into Dave & Busters and sat down to eat. I think I got a burger and fries and he got pasta. He then got a couple of game cards with an unknown amount to me and told me to just play away. We played so many games that night. Mike even knew my love of stuffed animals since I was a little girl, attempted that claw game, and somehow won me TWO big stuffed animals (a bear and an elephant) on just one play. While walking around with two animals under one arm looking for another game to play, Michael reached for my hand. I instantly got a million butterflies in my stomach. I don’t really know why it took so long for this to happen, but talking about it now, we both didn't want to rush anything and were both waiting for the other to make the first move.

To fast forward a little, he came over for a little after as I told my parents what a fun night I had and they got to meet him. We went outside for Mike to then leave and I just thought about how badly I wanted him to just kiss me already! We talked for a little on my front doorstep, and when it was time for him to leave, we went in for a hug goodbye. Time seemed to stand still for a few seconds. I just held onto him. Then, it happened. As I pulled away, I looked up at him and BAM, he kissed me! I was so so so so happy :) It was just a simple kiss and then he left, but to me, it was perfect.