{To My Husband}

To my amazing, self-less husband:

I don't think there is anything I could possibly love more than you. 

I look at you every single day and wonder how I got so lucky. I wonder how I was able to find a man who cared so much about the people around him and tried so hard to make people happy. I look at you and thank God for the huge blessing he put in my life. I look at you and smile every single day and can't wait to spend the rest of my life and eternity with you. 

Things have happened and are going to happen from here on out. Things are not exactly going to go our way for the rest of our lives. But I know one thing for sure. I have a man who is by my side and holds me when I cry and you have a woman who will love you unconditionally and be your #1 fan no matter what. 

You make being your wife the easiest thing in the world. You jump up and start making dinner for me almost every night. You suggest randomly that you want take me to a movie, out to eat or to other activities. You help with laundry and dishes without ever being asked. You carry things for me, open my door, and always let me steal bites of your food. You kiss me goodbye every morning when you leave when I'm barely awake and give me a big hug whenever I get home from work. You compliment me constantly and never complain when I go shopping. You notice when I change my hair or even when I get a new shirt. 

Every day, you show me that you love me. And yes I hear several "I love you"s every day too, but I love that you go out of your way to show me and make me feel special. 

If love is looking at someone and just knowing that no matter what happens you will always have them and they are all you need, then I promise to always love you. 

Every day. 

{Why I Love My Little Apartment}

Last weekend, Mike and I moved. And moving is not fun. On top of just the whole entire physical move, I was starting to get really sad about where we were moving too. We were moving out of a 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom house, with a garage, backyard, big kitchen, and more, into a 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment on the second floor that is about half the size of our house we were renting. This meant no garage to store things in, we would be walking up and down the stairs constantly, and we just didn't have as much room as we used to. So, as you can imagine, it was hard downsizing. However, now that we have been living at our apartment for a week, it's home and I love it there! And here are some of the reasons that I love my little apartment:

1. Less room means Michael and I get to be a lot closer all the time. We are pretty much always by each other in the apartment and I don't have to yell across the house to tell him something when he is in the other room.

2. Less space=less space to clean and take care of. Now we don't have to worry about taking care of the yard, mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, etc (which we rarely even had time for working full time and having things going on every night). I don't have spare bedrooms and bathrooms I have to clean. I don't have a garage I have to clean and organize. The only rooms I have to clean are the living room, kitchen, our bedroom, the bathroom, and my closet (which is pretty much the size of a room).

3. Speaking of my closet...MY CLOSET! It's absolutely huge. The master closet in the house was a pretty good size but I had to keep some of my clothes elsewhere and I was always stepping on my shoes on the ground because I had no where else to put them. The closet in my apartment is probably my favorite thing about our apartment. I'm seriously when I say it's huge. We even have room to put a dresser and big shoe rack in there. I finally have all my clothes and shoes in one place, along with Mike's clothes and shoes, as well as a section for food storage and just extra storage. My closet rocks.

4. Neighbors. Our old neighborhood was a housing development and I rarely saw my neighbors. In the 6 months we lived there, Mike and I probably talked to the neighbors on the right twice and never even saw the neighbors on our left. People would always just pull in and out of their garage and we wouldn't actually ever see them. Now, I am constantly walking by neighbors saying hello on our way to the car or pool. It's pretty nice seeing the people who live around you.

5. Living in our apartment complex means we get access to all of our amenities! In the house, we just had...well, the house. In our apartment, we get 2 pools, a spa, a tennis court, a small golfing green, a sand volleyball court, a gym, and more. It's nice to have those little extras.

6. Mike and I get to finally be our own persons. Mike and I attend the LDS church, and for my entire life, I have never been able to kind of "be my own person" and "have my own identity". This has absolutely nothing to do with the church though. When I lived with my parents, I was "Kirk and Jenny's daughter". When I went to the Singles' Ward with my brother, I was "Cody's sister". Even when Mike and I got married, we were "the brother and sister in law" of his sister and brother. Now, we are actually our own family and that's how people know us. We will be "Mike and Dani Gabriella" and no "so-and-so's family member" will be included after that. It's kinda nice :)

7. We pay less for electricity. Enough said.

8. We live next to two of our best friends. Enough said, again.

9. We have all the space we need. Don't get me wrong, living in that house was nice, however, I am glad that we have our own little space now and it's all the space we need. We don't need to live in a big house. All we need is each other. And I would rather live in a small apartment any day and get to spend all my time being next to Michael, than living in a big house and have all of these nice belongings. Mike said the cutest, cheesiest thing to me the other day-he said, "I don't care where we live, as long as I get to live with you." But hey, that's exactly how we feel about each other. Our time to have our own, big house will come, but that's not what we need right now. We will work for it, save for it, and enjoy it later. And I think that will be the best part about it; that we are the ones who made our own dream house a reality. But for now, our apartment is home. 

{How I Know My Marriage Will Last}

Both before and after I got married, I would run into two kinds of people. There would be the people who were super excited for me, talked about how awesome marriage is, and seemed happy with their own marriage/relationship. The other people...I did not like talking to as much. They would reply with "Psh, good luck with that" or talk about how 50% of marriages end in divorce and how "I may seem all in love not, but that will go away." And if you are in a relationship or marriage and telling ME that my love will go away, maybe you should start evaluating your own relationship first before you start criticizing mine.

I love Michael.

Plain and simple, I love him. When we got married, I swore to the ends of the earth, to God, and to Michael that I would love him forever. And that's exactly what I plan on doing for the rest of my life. I plan on trying to take care of him. I plan on hugging him tight every day. I plan on being goofy and trying to make him laugh. I plan on surprising him with things he loves. I plan on loving him. And if he didn't plan on doing the same, I wouldn't have married him. 

You know who's love I love? My parents. They have a good love. They will dance in the kitchen together, laugh together, go on dates every week, compliment and make fun of each other, and hug and kiss every single day. They love each other and they are happy together. They have been married for 24 years and that love "hasn't gone away" because they chose to stay true to those commitments they made to each other and work through any trials that came their way.

If both people in the relationship try to do as much as they can for the other and not be selfish, I don't see how the marriage could fail. I honestly don't. I married the most unselfish person I have ever met in my entire life. I couldn't have asked for a more faithful and helpful husband. So, because of him, I am trying so hard every day to not be selfish. I let him go out with friends when he wants, I let him buy what he wants, I try to cook and clean so he doesn't have to, I work so he doesn't have to worry about supporting both of us, and I try to make him as happy as I can. But I don't feel like it will ever amount to what he does for me. He makes me happier than I have ever been in my entire life. So next time you think about how your relationship may be failing, go a day just doing things for the other person and not asking anything in return. I promise you that THAT is the key to a successful relationship-not asking what they can do for you, but what you can do for them. 

After all, a line in our first dance song at our wedding was "I want to make you feel wanted".

Love-it's a good feeling, so make it last. 

{Just Get Over It}

Jealousy. Greed. Envy. We all go through it. There are always going to be things that other people have that we want, whether it be material belongings, a certain look, their lifestyle, or their relationship with somebody.

Most of the reasons that I feel that people dislike someone is because of jealousy. They want what the other person has, can't get or achieve it, so hence, they hate that person for it. That shouldn't be the way that the world revolves. Instead, we should be happy for the things others have. 

Women especially have this problem, and make it into an even bigger problem. A woman will see another woman that is skinnier, "prettier", richer, or that just seems happier, and automatically hate that woman over jealousy. Women want what other women have. It's as simple as that. You could be a woman that grew up just getting everything you ever wanted because your parents had money and still have hard feelings towards another woman who wasn't given as much, but just looks happier. And that same woman that looks super happy could be jealous of the woman who was just given everything in her life. It's a vicious cycle, ladies. 

I am definitely not innocent in all of this though. No woman is. Being women, we love competition and we seem to make everything a competition, whether it be how white your teeth are, how your kids behave, how nicely your house is decorated, or how cute your pictures are. 

We all just need to give up. Just give up already! Face the facts. You'll never be as skinny as that girl at the gym. Your kids will never behave as well as that mom's at the grocery store. But guess what, they have insecurities too and probably think that they will never have your cute, unique fashion sense. 

We need to stop wanting what other women have and doing whatever it takes to achieve it. Don't want it just because someone else has it. Want it because it would improve YOUR life in a positive way and is the best thing for you. 

Let me tell you a few of the positive things that I am proud of in my life. I met the love of my life at 18 years old and married him one month shy of 20. I bought my own car at 19. My husband and I live in an adorable 3 bed/2 bath house. I love my job. I have amazing friends that I still get together with here and there. Michael and I have happy, supportive families. And I could go on and on about the good things in my life. Or I could be the person that chooses to complain that we have to move out of the house we're renting in 2 months and pay the same price for a one bedroom apartment (crazy, I know). I could complain about how the heater and gas gauge don't work in my truck and I have to push super hard on the door to get it open. I could also complain about how my teeth will never be white enough, my hair never thick enough, and how I don't have the body that I desire, but why would I? Those comments put myself down and make it awkward for everyone else around me when I complain. I'm trying to look at the positive things in my life and be happy for what I have and who I am. 

So lastly ladies, love yourselves. Love each other. Be nice. Stop with the drama. Stop being selfish. Stop making things a competition. Look for things that you can do for others instead of looking for what others can do for you. If you ask someone for a favor, return that favor. It would be greatly appreciated. Show others that you care. Make things about others, instead of yourself. I can promise you, your life will suddenly be much better and you will be so much happier.

{Why I Don't Want Kids.....Right Now}

I can’t even count the times that I have gone through this conversation:

Person 1: “So, when are you two going to have kids?!”

Me: “Actually, probably not for another couple of years.”

Person 1: “Oh…really?....Why?”

And then I have to tell them my personal reasons for not wanting to have a kid the second after I get married.

So, I decided to just let everyone know what those reasons are and my opinion of why I do not want a kid right away.

However, I do not want anyone with kids or who had kids young to take this post offensively. I do love kids. It’s just not for me right now. And I’m sure you wouldn't give your kid(s) up for anything and will never regret having them, however, everyone is different. So, without further ado:

1.       I love Michael and I’s spontaneous date nights.

See, Mike and I usually never plan dates nights. They always just...happen. I mean, we plan the bigger events, but we love getting home, noticing we have nothing planned for the night, looking up show times and just deciding to do dinner and a movie or just going shopping. However, I feel like we won’t have much of that once we start having kids. Our date nights will have to be planned in advance so we can get a babysitter or we will just take our kids with us if we really want to go out and can’t find a babysitter for the night.

2.       Sleeping in

Boy, do Mike and I love sleeping in on our Sundays. Once we have kids though, forget it, at least until they are old enough to watch over themselves. We would be waking up whenever they do to feed them, make sure they don’t fight or hurt themselves, and all of the other responsibilities that come along with being a parent.

3.       Working and Earning Money

Personally, I LOVE my job. I love what I do and I love my coworkers. I look forward to seeing them every day and all the laughs we have together. I love being able to work and make my own money, instead of leaving my husband to go to work every day, pay all the bills, and make extra money for me to spend. I love that I am able to contribute, help pay bills, help pay off debt, and earn some money that allows us to have fun as well. I think it is going to be very hard for me when I am a stay at home mom to not be making some sort of money. However, I have engrained in my mind that I will never be that wife that makes her husband stress about money. Even if I am only making $100 a month selling homemade quilts or something (totally random, I know), I want to be doing something to help contribute. Today, I was talking to one of my coworkers about her, her husband and her son, and her choice to work. I am honestly very impressed by her decision to go to work every day to make a better life in the future for her family. That is very respectable to me. It is very true though. Although she may not be able to spend every waking moment with her son, she is working hard to be able to give him and her husband an easier life. I feel like that will very well pay off a lot better in the long run. Same goes for my mom. Although she doesn't work a lot because she is VERY busy taking care of so many kids and donating her time constantly, she still finds time to be an awesome, dedicated Realtor and bring in a good amount of money.  I respect working moms very much. (However, I know there are moms out there who physically can’t work, and that is 100% understandable.)

4.       Vacations

Yes, you can still take vacations with your children, but it’s not the same. A trip to the beach before you have kids entails sun tanning, sleeping in, and doing pretty much whatever you want. When you bring the kids along, it’s a constant worry about if they have on enough sunscreen, making sure they don’t get lost or drown, bringing all of the toys along, etc. I am positive my parents enjoy their vacations 150x more when they are alone instead of bringing all of the kids along. Not to mention, vacations without kids is A LOT cheaper too.

5.       I want to just spend time with my husband

Michael and I have only been married for 5 months now. I am still getting to know him and still loving finding out new things about him. I want to spend some time, just him and I, for a while before we start a family. Once you have kids, they are there forever. So, I want to wait a couple years or so before we start a family. I love just having a family of two right now.

I am just going to go ahead and stop there though. I have a few more reasons, like kids are expensive and watching other people’s kids is already enough ‘kid time’ for me, but I better stop before this list gets too long. Again though, nothing is wrong with having kids young, having a lot of kids, or having kids in general. I’m just saying why it’s not for me RIGHT NOW. And I don’t think there is anything wrong with any of my reasons of not wanting a baby right now. I love kids and one day I will wake up thinking “I’m ready” but that day won’t be soon, unless God plans otherwise. One thing I know for sure though, is that Mike will be one amazing father and we will make some cute babies!

{What I Gave Up By Getting Married}

I have heard numerous times that I would be/am giving up a lot in my life by getting married, especially getting married young. I always ignore these comments (or have something to say back to them), but tonight I decided to finally admit that I actually did give up a lot by getting married to Mike. So, here are the things I gave up because I got married:

1.       Super awkward dates

I don’t think Mike and I have actually ever had an awkward date. I love that I get to go on a date a couple times a week with the same guy, we always have a blast, and I never have anything to worry about. I am more than happy saying goodbye to those awkward relationship starters.

2.       Weekends alone

I mean, yes, I had my friends that I would hang out with, but when you’re a single girl, the main thing you are looking for on a night out is a cute guy. And there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that. It was actually pretty fun. But then at the end of the night, I would go home alone wishing that I found the man of my dreams already. And when my friends were busy, I wouldn't really have anyone to hang out with. Now, Mike and I spend time together all the time and I am so beyond happy!

3.       Paying bills on my own

Actually, now that I am married and out of the house, I have a lot more bills to pay than when I was living at home. Well, WE have a lot more bills to pay. However, having two incomes makes it so much easier to pay bills for some reason. You just don’t feel like you are doing everything on your own. And if it costs me more money to be able to be married to Mike, I think that is so worth it.

4.       Wondering if I am beautiful

It’s nice hearing every day that I am beautiful no matter how I look. And I know that sounds super cliché, but he does tell me every single day that I look good or I’m pretty or beautiful. A lot of men just think it goes without saying, but I love that my husband says it to me.

5.       Dancing with “randoms”

If there is a party that has dancing, I’m there. I love dancing my heart out at parties, even though I know I’m not very good. But I love it, especially themed parties. A lot of times, being a girl, when you go to a school dance or dance party, you wonder who you are going to end up going with and dancing with. You think about how you want to be good at dancing and not embarrass yourself. And most of all, you want to have a good time with whoever you are dancing with. I absolutely love dancing with my husband. We just get each other, move well together, and just have a blast. My favorite two times dancing with him was at the Uprising Paint Fight and our first dance at our wedding.

6.       Relying on my parents for everything

I mean, I still go to them for a lot. But now I have to keep my own house clean, cook my own meals, buy my own groceries, budget our money, and all of those other duties. And Mike definitely makes that easier for me. And when I say easier, I’m meaning like makes it the easiest ever for me! He takes care of our budget and always helps me with all of the chores. We now rely on each other and I love that about our relationship.

7.       Sleeping alone

I like having something or someone next to me in bed. When I lived with my parents, it was either my dog or my stuffed giraffe, usually my dog though. I love being able to curl up next to my husband in bed with his arm around and feeling so safe and comfortable falling asleep for the night.

8.       Being selfish with my time and money

Instead of spending all my money on clothes and going out like I used to, I now am more careful about what I spend my money on. And I know a lot of people would have a hard time with this, but it’s pretty easy for me. I gladly saved up a few hundred dollars to be able to buy my husband another gun. I do that because I love him. I would rather spend my money on him and my time doing things for him. I feel like that is true love. Being married to Mike has made me want to not be selfish.

9.       My lack of self confidence

Now, this hasn't left me completely. But I have definitely felt a lot more confident being married to Michael. That kind of goes along with the “feeling beautiful” post a few paragraphs up. He makes me feel funny, pretty, sweet, and just overall amazing. He has definitely boosted my self-confidence by a ton. I just feel so loved by him. And I can’t help but show it by the huge smile he puts on my face.

10.   Dreaming of my Prince Charming…..because I found him!!!

I used to day dream about the perfect man/husband all the time. I wanted him to be tall, funny, sweet, athletic, fun, and of course handsome. I wanted a man that made me feel beautiful and incredible. I wanted a man that got along with my family and whose family welcomed me in. I wanted a man who still took me on dates and kissed me all the time. I wanted a man who I could watch play sports and feel proud that he was mine. I wanted a man who would hold me tight, kiss me on the cheek and tell me he loves me. I found that man. I found the MOST PERFECT man for me. Michael Anthony is the man of my dreams. I met him, wanted him, asked him out first, and somehow convinced him to marry me. I love that I never have to wonder again when my Prince Charming will come into my life. I now just have to look over and see him standing right next to me.

So, I did give up a lot by getting married, however, I don’t think any of them will take any getting used to. Marrying Michael was the best thing that ever happened to me.

{The People You Should Not Date}

To start off, there are many people that everyone knows you shouldn't date, like the typical jerk, player, drama queen, addict, and all those other stereotypes. But I want to go a little bit more deeper than that. So, these are the people who I think you should just avoid dating.

Don't be in a relationship with someone who:

1. Is JUST your best friend.

Yes, I know everyone says to "date/marry your best friend", and while that is a good thing for your significant other to be, that's not the only thing they should be. On top of being your best friend, you should also be attracted to them and have other feelings for them other than "best friend". You should be in love with them, not just love them. If I married someone who was just my best friend, I could have married like 8 different people (you know who you are), mostly being girls. So, I say avoid dating the "best friend" unless you see them as someone more than just your best friend.

2. Makes you do all the work.

I've been in relationships like this. They suck. It just plains sucks. And I think everyone has been in a relationship like this sometime in their life. You spend your money on them and they rarely spend money on you. You change your plans to their plans. You do what they want to do. You hang out with their family and rarely yours. And just everything seems to be about them while you're running around trying to make them happy. They're just making you do all the work in the relationship. And if you feel like that is the relationship you are in now, my advice-GET OUT NOW! It may be hard, but I can promise you that you can find someone who dedicates as much time and energy to you as you do to them. 

3. Has only one good quality-their looks.

How many times do people have to say this. It's not worth it to date someone who's only good quality is their looks!!! Yes, they may be totally sexy and have a killer smile, but if they are boring or have a crappy personality, do you really want to be with them? Looks fade, honey. I'm the type of girl who loves hearing people talk about their significant others, why they like them, and how they met. And I find it SO sad when I ask someone about their lover, they say, "They're sooo hot" and that's it. They usually mention something about them either being super conceited, rude or not treating them very good, but for some reason it's okay just because they are attractive. Don't get me wrong, it's perfectly fine to be attracted to someone. Actually, it's great. Michael is the most attractive guy in the entire world to me. But, that shouldn't be the only positive you can say about the person you are dating.

4. Loves to make you jealous or piss you off.

I don't even think I need to go any further on this one. It's just messed up, they don't truly care about you, and you shouldn't be with them. Period.

5. Doesn't encourage you to be your best self.

Your significant other should always be supporting you and encouraging you in every way possible no matter what. Whether it's in school, religion, work, hobbies, skills, sports, or just absolutely ANYTHING! One small thing Michael does is to encourage me to get ready for the day sometimes. It's not like he's telling me to go put on some make up because I look ugly without it, he encourages me to do my hair, make up, and get dressed up because he knows that it boosts my self esteem so much more. Whenever we go out and I'm just in yoga pants, with a pony tail and a little make up, we have so much fun and he still thinks I'm beautiful. But the best nights ever are the ones when I get ready; when my hair is all curled and I spent time on my make up and I have a cute little outfit on. He knows that looking good makes me a lot happier and makes me feel a lot better about myself. Your significant other should always be encouraging  you to do whatever would make you the happiest.

6. Doesn't listen to you.

Communication is key. Seriously. That's like the number one thing needed to make a relationship work. And if you find that your significant other never listens to you or doesn't care for your opinion, well then, your relationship will never work unless that gets fixed. It's as simple as that. 

7. Doesn't want you to hang out with friends.

One thing I love about Michael is that is he 100% supportive of Girls' Night. He understands that I need a little time with my girls to gossip, laugh, take pictures, and talk....A LOT, just like I know that he needs his bowling or COD nights. Before we had each other, we had our friends. We love our friends. And you shouldn't be with someone who only wants you to hang out with them and never wants you to be with your friends. Being in a relationship like that completely drains you. Your significant other should keep in mind that they're not the only person in your entire life. 

So, kind of going in an opposite perspective, here is the person you should be with. You should be with someone who is your best friend and more, someone who would do anything for you, someone who is good looking AND has a lot of other good qualities, someone who wants to make you happy, someone who encourages you to be your best self, someone who listens to you and someone who supports your friendships. That's the perfect person for you. Believe me. And it may take a while to find that person, but it will all be worth it in the end. Trust me. I found mine.